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Friday, 22 July 2016

OK not OK

When an OK doesn't really mean an OK. And many times, my okay wasn't really something i'm comfortable with, agree with and worst, really not in a state where i'm really okay with it. Only to feel hurt personally. 

Especially when A second of Hope from a message turns into a 100 minute of Disappointment. Sounds dramatic? ohh, that's how i feel MOST of the time. thou' i taught myself many times not to be hopeful, yet again, I failed again and again. 

The only consolation i guess this week was a surprise meet up on a saturday. an hour and a half of that morning getting a lil clingy and letting out a huge huff from missing him badly. That session, brings an all day smiles to me and changed my mood instantly. 

Again, unexpected circumstances happened. Less communication, a rushed ones. Situations doesn't permits....... i'm trying to digest this again and again. Again and Again. 

Is saying i love you suffice? Is missing the one you love enough to secure it? If you couldn't try to understand how your other half feeling too. am i really your other half, will be the next question. 

 I'm not sure if i'm being overly sensitive for nothing. But i'm missing the attention. I'm missing the real love. I miss the real situation. If you could understand me. 

sigh! literally i'm tired. i need a vitamin for my heart. 

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